Kristina writes a weekly reflection which places the esoteric teachings into daily life. They are thought provoking and pertinent to 21st Century living. They focus on how we can express our I AM, our True Self, more fully in daily situations.

Seven Letters 2

James, a servant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ, To the twelve tribes in the Dispersion: Greeting. Count it all joy, my brethren, when you meet various trials, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. James 1:1-4

When we explore the meaning of the Greek words translated into English in the Bible, we find deeper, broader meanings. This is the case with any language; however it is more difficult with a language like Koine or Biblical Greek which was spoken over 2,000 years ago. Hidden within these texts are many deeper meanings which are only revealed to those who dedicate themselves to unraveling them.

Here is one way to re-express the first verse.

James, the supplanter, is replacing or ‘filling a place’ once occupied by something that is no longer adequate. As a servant, doulos, he is giving himself up to the will of God and the Lord Jesus Christ. This giving up of one’s self is not mindless subservience; it is done with full conscious awareness. It does not involve bondage, there is equality about it, and we find this equality in the I Am, the ego eimi, the Higher Self.

From this position James is writing to “the twelve tribes in the Dispersion”. James gives us a sense of what is taking place when he mentions the Dispersion, the diaspora, the scattering. This speaks of individuals moving away from a state where they were led by elders, and taking responsibility for themselves and their own work in the world.

We can apply this idea to what takes place within us as our consciousness evolves, then the twelve tribes can be seen as the twelve mind faculties. These faculties were also represented by the twelve disciples.

Andrew                                 Inner strength and humility
Simon Peter                         Hearing and faith
Phillip                                   Power
Nathanael Bartholomew      Imagination
Judas                                   Generative forces
Thomas                                Understanding
John                                      Love
Thaddaeus                            Renunciation and elimination
Matthew                                 Will, the tax collector
James the son of Alphaeus    Order
James the son of Zeb’edee    Discrimination or Judgement
Simon the Cananaean            Zeal, enthusiasm
From “I Am the Soul’s Heartbeat Volume 4” by Kristina Kaine

Then James says, “Greeting”, this is not a simple “Hello”. This is a deep recognition and respect for what is taking place in others. The Greek word for greeting is chairo and it means joy and rejoice – it is signaling a celebration. “Greeting. Count it all joy, my brethren” speaks to us of a new level of cooperation between those who are awakening to the presence of Christ within and around them since the crucifixion on Golgotha. They have been reborn and James calls them brethren, adelphos, meaning they come from the same womb – in this case the womb of Christ.

The word ‘count’, hegeomai, means to lead or be a leader, and points to the way in which each individual demonstrates that they are walking this new path. No longer is it about saying we obey the law, now the inner law expresses itself in everything we do, in every thought and feeling that guides our behavior. This is especially important when we “meet various trials”. The word ‘meet’ is peripipto which means to descend from a higher place to a lower. Trials can only be met in a lower place.

This explains that we can’t rise up to our Higher Self and ignore what takes place below. We live on this earth for a reason; we have descended from the spiritual worlds to become self-realized individuals. We see this same modus operandi in the descent of Christ into the body of Jesus.

Trials, peirasmos, describe an experiment, a proving. This is exactly what we do; we prove that we are capable of living on this earth while engaging with the influence of the Higher Self. Jesus showed us how to do this; he was fully engaged with earthly life as he, over three years, took into himself the highest, the Christ Spirit.

In verse 3 we read, “for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.”

Know, ginosko, means to fully enter into a thing. Ginosko is the Jewish idiom for sexual intercourse. Testing, dokímion, speaks of the proof, the acceptable evidence not just the activity of testing itself. Faith pistis, doesn’t mean to believe blindly, it speaks of the experience of ginosko, of fully entering into the matter. Steadfastness, hypomone, indicates patient endurance and it has a sense of waiting while knowing what we are waiting for.

We get a sense of a real experience, a life-changing experience, rather than a theory to be unraveled. If we could go back to the society at the time of Christ we would probably understand what a massive change was taking place within those who were experiencing the deed of Christ as a reality in their lives.

In verse 4 the presence of the I Am is suggested in the words ‘have’ echo and ‘be’ eimi.

“And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.”

Have, echo, means to possess one’s self – and points to possessing the Higher Self. “Perfect and complete” is not a good translation. The Greek words are “Telios ergon” where teleios means the full effect and ergon means work. Again suggesting that we need to make complete effort and then nothing will be lacking, leipo, which means leave behind. So we will leave nothing behind which is an important point because often when actions are taken there are leftover effects.

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The Seven Letters 3

If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives to all men generously and without reproaching, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. For that person must not suppose that a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways, will receive anything from the Lord. James 1:5-8

Reading this text superficially we are given a sense of the power of God in the light of our own powerlessness. We could think that we are being asked to give in, and give up our will, to a mighty being not fully known to us. Yet, what takes place in us when we remove doubting? Our will becomes active. We don’t simply push doubting away blindly, we explore inner meanings, which is what we are doing by exploring the words in this sacred text in the hope of moving from doubting to knowing. This is the purpose of all sacred writing; it holds the truth securely only to reveal it to those who dedicate themselves to seeking it.

Verse five begins with a mighty statement, “If any of you lacks wisdom” which in the original language says, “If any of you leaves behind Sophia”. The word ‘lacks’ is eipo which primarily means to leave, leave behind, or forsake. The word ‘wisdom’ is Sophia.

In his lectures on The Gospel of St John, Rudolf Steiner describes Sophia in this way.

“This cleansed, purified astral body, which bears within it at the moment of illumination none of the impure impressions of the physical world, but only the organs of perception of the spiritual world, is called in esoteric Christianity the “pure, chaste, wise Virgin Sophia.” Lecture 12 May 31, 1908

In the Bible we find Sophia in Mary, the mother of Jesus, specifically the mother of the Luke Jesus.

You will conceive and give birth to a son, and you are to call him Jesus. He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. […] “How will this be,” Mary asked the angel, “since I am a virgin?” Luke 1:31,32,34

Does Sophia have a place in our life? Or have we left her behind? In sacred texts every detail matters. We can’t simply focus on Jesus and ignore all the other characters just as we can’t focus on our physical body and ignore our etheric, astral and ‘I’ bodies. Unless we become part of Sophia we cannot give birth to Christ.

We can put this quite simply by saying that if we cleanse our astral body, by purifying our feeling, thinking, and will in our soul, we enable our soul, Sophia, to give birth to Jesus, our I Am, facilitating the entrance of the living Christ into our soul. This reveals to us all the elements we must work on if we are to have wisdom and develop organs of perception. In his book “The Most Holy Trinosophia” Robert Powell reveals many details about the place of Sophia, the “Divine Feminine” in our lives. He says, “a true knowledge of this being is vital for a meaningful understanding of the Second Coming of Christ.”

James tells us that if we have left Sophia behind, there is a way to find her. He says;

“let him ask God, who gives to all men generously and without reproaching, and it will be given him.”

The inner meaning of some of these words gives us a greater understanding of what we can do to restore our relationship with Sophia. First we must ask. Ask in Greek is aiteo which means to desire and ask of someone in a higher position. Our desires have their home in our astral body, and the ‘one’ in a higher position is our soul where our desires are purified.

James says to ask God, theos, which is a general name of deities or divinities. These divinities are all the higher beings in the Cosmos from Angels to Cherubim (see my book “Bible Unlocked” for more detail about these beings). We can ask these beings out of a confident knowing that they are with us, surrounding us on this earth, as they guide all the conditions of the Universe to make life on earth possible for us.

How often do we think of the activity of these beings during the day? When we are able to factor them into our thoughts we draw on the wisdom that is Sophia. These beings then give generously: give is didomi, and speaks of adding something, producing something. This adding or producing is directly related to our ability to acknowledge their activity. Haplos is the word used for generously, but rather than generously it means simply, openly, sincerely. This adds to the sense of working together with these higher beings where something is exchanged according to the contribution we each make. There will be no reproach, oneidizo, which means blame or criticism. This tells us that we have no need to hide our flaws that are now revealed to our heightened spiritual insight.

The next verse is straightforward:

“But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind.”

Faith pistis, means knowing, and ‘without doubting’ is diakrino: dia means through and krino means to separate out, to judge, to contend, to differ, which speaks of rebalancing, and doing it continually as each new piece of truth is understood. Truth, alethes, is the process of unforgetting and it is continual. Each new aspect of truth shines a light on the greater truth.

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I AM The Soul's Heartbeat: The Seven I AM Sayings in The Gospel of St John by [Kaine, Kristina]


“Kristina Kaine has distilled from the profound wisdom of masters and of her own considerable experience a guidebook of immense value in pursuing the pearl of great price, the name that no one knows except the one who receives it, the “I Am.” Every human soul stands in need of this name, and our world cries out for the ennoblement of those who make this quest. —Ed Smith, Author : The Burning Bush, The Soul’s Long Journey, David’s Question “What is Man?” Bible and Anthroposophy

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Reflections on the Seven I AM sayings in the Gospel of St John January – September 2003 – Always free

IAM1-001 I AM the Good Shepherd 5 – 24 June 2003

For this reason the Father loves me, because I lay down my life, that I may take it again. No one takes it from me, but I lay it down of my own accord. I have power to lay it down, and I have power to take it again; this charge I have received from my Father.” John 10:17f

These words speak about the ultimate sacrifice. To sacrifice our life … and to be able to sacrifice requires that you actually have something to sacrifice. This sacrifice is not that of a soldier fighting for his country, or a quasi-martyr suicide bomber. This is the shepherd giving his life for his sheep. This is about the gentle and good shepherd and the pure and innocent sheep.


John 20, Food for the I AM 1 Now on the first day of the week Mary Mag’dalene came to the tomb early, while it was still dark, and saw that the stone had been taken away from the tomb. 2 So she ran, and went to Simon Peter and the other disciple, the one whom Jesus loved, and said to them, “They have taken the Lord out of the tomb, and we do not know where they have laid him.” 3 Peter then came out with the other disciple, and they went toward the tomb. 4 They both ran, but the other disciple outran Peter and reached the tomb first; 5 and stooping to look in, he saw the linen cloths lying there, but he did not go in. 6 Then Simon Peter came, following him, and went into the tomb; he saw the linen cloths lying, 7 and the napkin, which had been on his head, not lying with the linen cloths but rolled up in a place by itself. 8 Then the other disciple, who reached the tomb first, also went in, and he saw and believed; 9 for as yet they did not know the scripture, that he must rise from the dead. 10 Then the disciples went back to their homes. John 20:1-10 RSV

We know that Christ had to die, but in many of the events surrounding his death choices were made. All through John 18 and 19 we see these choices, especially by Pilate and certainly by the Jews. When an event occurs without choice John writes “this was to fulfil the word”. With this in mind let’s have a look at the morning-after story when Mary and the two disciples visit the tomb. They make many choices.

Let’s say that Christ represents the I AM that must die. The Bible also tells us that a seed must die. A thoughtful person knows that a seed carries within it forces for the future. It is formed by a plant, it actually causes the plant’s death, then it rises again as a totally new plant (not cloned from the old one).


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Reflections of the Seven Christian Initiations in the Gospel of St John, September 2003 – May 2004

IAM2-001 The Mystical Death 2 – 9 May 2004 – We die to live

Read John 19:23- 42 After this Jesus, knowing that all was now finished, said (to fulfil the scripture), “I thirst.” A bowl full of vinegar stood there; so they put a sponge full of the vinegar on hyssop and held it to his mouth. When Jesus had received the vinegar, he said, “It is finished”; and he bowed his head and gave up his spirit. 19:28-30

When a person or a thing dies we are told that it no longer exists except as ashes or refuse. Close scrutiny reveals that the opposite is true.

Consider this text in John 12 And Jesus answered them, “The hour has come for the Son of man to be glorified. Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit. John 12:23-24


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Reflections on the Eightfold Path of Buddha in the Gospel of St John, June 2004 – December 2004


Read John 5:22-30 The Father judges no one, but has given all judgment to the Son, that all may honor the Son, even as they honor the Father. He who does not honor the Son does not honor the Father who sent him. Truly, truly, I say to you, he who hears my word and believes him who sent me, has eternal life; he does not come into judgment, but has passed from death to life. John 5:22-24

As the Father is about the will, the Son is about thinking. Judging is no longer cosmically impelled; our judging now arises through our personal thinking. This thinking must be rigorous. A reason for errors of judgement is that thinking is not carried through to the end. It is so easy to jump off the train of thought prematurely. Early conclusions are so tempting, not to mention the time that they save. Lucifer always encourages us to take the easy way out.


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Reflections on the Twelve Disciples using the Gospel of St John, January – December 2005


Nathanael – Two – Imagining

Philip found Nathan’a-el, and said to him, “We have found him of whom Moses in the law and also the prophets wrote, Jesus of Nazareth, the son of Joseph.” Nathan’a-el said to him, “Can anything good come out of Nazareth?” Philip said to him, “Come and see.” Jesus saw Nathan’a-el coming to him, and said of him, “Behold, an Israelite indeed, in whom is no guile!” Nathan’a-el said to him, “How do you know me?” Jesus answered him, “Before Philip called you, when you were under the fig tree, I saw you.” Nathan’a-el answered him, “Rabbi, you are the Son of God! You are the King of Israel!” Jesus answered him, “Because I said to you, I saw you under the fig tree, do you believe? You shall see greater things than these.” And he said to him, “Truly, truly, I say to you, you will see heaven opened, and the angels of God ascending and descending upon the Son of man.” John 1:45-51

Nathanael represents one of the most misunderstood human abilities, our Imagination. In reality, Imagination extends our consciousness into another dimension. It is a spiritual faculty which does not rely on our physical brain nor does it have a mystical element. Through it we penetrate the veil which separates the physical and spiritual worlds. At this point our abstract thinking dissolves and we see into outer forms to the spiritual truth that sustains them. This can begin simply by looking at a plant or tree that droops towards the ground in a sad way, or a flower that lifts its head to smile at the sun. This imagining connects us in new ways with the outer world.


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Reflections on the Signs in the Gospel of St John, January – July 2006

Water to Wine – One – Changing Feeling into Thinking


On the third day there was a marriage at Cana in Galilee, and the mother of Jesus was there; Jesus also was invited to the marriage, with his disciples. When the wine failed, the mother of Jesus said to him, “They have no wine.” And Jesus said to her, “O woman, what have you to do with me? My hour has not yet come.” His mother said to the servants, “Do whatever he tells you.” Now six stone jars were standing there, for the Jewish rites of purification, each holding twenty or thirty gallons. Jesus said to them, “Fill the jars with water.” And they filled them up to the brim. He said to them, “Now draw some out, and take it to the steward of the feast.” So they took it. When the steward of the feast tasted the water now become wine, and did not know where it came from (though the servants who had drawn the water knew), the steward of the feast called the bridegroom and said to him, “Every man serves the good wine first; and when men have drunk freely, then the poor wine; but you have kept the good wine until now.” This, the first of his signs, Jesus did at Cana in Galilee, and manifested his glory; and his disciples believed in him. John 2:1-11

This series of Reflections will explore the so called signs in the Gospel of St John. These signs are also associated with miracles performed by Jesus after he was baptised by John the Baptist. If we take the life of Jesus as a blue print for our own spiritual development, we can use events such as these signs and miracles as a barometer of our progress.


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Reflections on the Nine Beatitudes using the Gospel of St John, August 2006 – March 2007


1.4 Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

We can look at each of the nine beatitudes in terms of the Christ-ening of the nine parts of our being; physical, etheric, astral and then the three soul and three spiritual regions. If we apply the first beatitude to our physical body we will find clues about how our I AM is enlivened in our body.

Our physical body is the most fully developed part of us. The physiology of the human being is a marvel. The way our skeleton, muscles and skin hold and protect our organs in a life giving way is truly wondrous.


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Reflections on the Book of Revelation, April 2007 – April 2010

SoulSecretPOD-001The revelation of Jesus Christ, which God gave him to show to his servants what must soon take place; and he made it known by sending his angel to his servant John, who bore witness to the word of God and to the testimony of Jesus Christ, even to all that he saw. Blessed is he who reads aloud the words of the prophecy, and blessed are those who hear, and who keep what is written therein; for the time is near. Rev 1:1-3

We can read and contemplate the bible in many ways. We should certainly take notice of the literal meaning of its stories. This becomes a most difficult task when we read the Revelation to John. The imagery is shocking, mystifying and bizarre, especially when we place it outside ourselves. It more closely resembles our dream life rather than our waking life.


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Reflections on Who is Jesus, What is Christ? May 2010 – October 2016


The Bible can only be fully understood when we have a detailed knowledge of the makeup of the human being. We can only have this understanding through our own personal experience of ourselves which we have applied and tested in our own lives throughout the day. When we are able to experience that we are beings of body, soul and spirit we then come to the point of experiencing ourselves as beings of soul and spirit which occupy our body much like we would occupy a car to transport us here and there.

If we can grasp this truth and actually have a personal experience of it, we can then approach the possibility of our soul and spirit entering repeatedly into different bodies at different times in history. This could be compared to upgrading the model of our car from time to time. There is a passage in the Bible that could support this idea of reincarnation. When the Jews heard that John the Baptist was baptising they sent their representatives to question him about who he was; Christ, Elijah, or the prophet?

And this is the testimony of John, when the Jews sent priests and Levites from Jerusalem to ask him, “Who are you?” He confessed, he did not deny, but confessed, “I am not the Christ.” And they asked him, “What then? Are you Elijah?” He said, “I am not.” “Are you the prophet?” And he answered, “No.” They said to him then, “Who are you? Let us have an answer for those who sent us. What do you say about yourself?” Jn 1:19-22

Why would they choose Elijah from all the possibilities? Furthermore, they knew that Elijah was long dead? It is possible that they recognised traits of Elijah’s in the Baptist or perhaps they had the spiritual vision to see who had been in the past. So if he was Elijah in a past life why didn’t he affirm this? To answer this question fully we need to consider in some detail how and why we enter into different bodies at different times throughout history.


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To Journey Back November 2016 ongoing

This is the story about a man who has just died. In the afterlife he is tracing the life he has just lived backwards. It is a life review, step by step, from the moment of the last breath back to the moment of the first breath, to re-experience every thought, feeling, and action and interaction he had through his life.

He remains connected with his close friends and, as he sees what they are doing in the days after his death, he understands more deeply the relationship he had with them. He also sees all the activity surrounding his death, which he was not aware of when he was alive.
More and more people who have had a near death experience are reporting that this is the experience we all have when we die. At some point in their after-life experience they decided to come back and continue living their current life. We have much to learn from them, not only for when we die, but for how we can live our lives on this earth more meaningfully.

If we can have a real experience of what happens when we die it will assist us to meet the end of our own life with more awareness. Our journey forward will then be a great contribution to human evolution. I hope you enjoy this journey.

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